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  1. #1
    antagenaiz's Avatar
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    Lawak Salah Faham

    Kisah Kawan Pak Pandir Dibaham Harimau

    Pak pandir: Selamat pagi tuan

    Polis: Selamat pagi...apa boleh saya bantu?

    Pak pandir: Saya nak buat report tuan..

    Polis: Pasal apa tu encik?

    Pak pandir: Pasal kawan saya di baham harimau...

    Polis: Pukul berapa

    Pak pandir: Tak sempat pukul tuan...harimau dah ngap dulu..

    Polis: ?? habis?..

    Pak pandir: Tak habis tuan..kepala kawan masih ada lagi


    Pelan Bangunan

    Tersebutlah cerita yang dikatakan berlaku di sebuah pejabat Majlis
    Perbandaran di negeri pantai timur:

    Kontraktor rumah : Ambo nok mitak kelulusan buat rumoh, lagu mano gak caro dia?
    Pegawai Bangunan : Lagu ni?, mulo-mulo wat pele (pelan) dulu.
    Kontraktor rumah : Pele? Ambo ado doh!
    Pegawai bangunan : Mano? Kalu ado wat tubik lah, kawe nok tengok.
    Kontraktor rumah : Errrr! Tak leh! Tak Leh!
    Pegawai Bangunan : Bak po tak lehnyo!, cepatlah wat tubik!
    Kontraktor rumah : Kalu tak tengok tak leh ko?
    Pegawai Bangunan : Tok leh la!!! kawe nak luluh rano, kalu kawe tak tengok!
    Kontraktor rumah : Eh! Ambo ghoyat doh, ambo malu nak tunjok.
    Pegawai Bangunan : Malu bakpo pulak? Pah tu bawok pele wat gapo kalu tak sir tunjok?
    Kontraktor rumah : Ehhh! malulah nak tunjok , pele ambo kecik!
    Pegawai Bangunan : Laa! Kecik pun tak apo, kalu cukup syarat! Kalu tak tunjok, kawe nak sain luluh lagu mano?
    Kontraktor rumah : Nak wat tubik nak tunjok kat mano?, orghe ramai ni! Malu ambo! Malu weh!
    Pegawai bangunan : La!, tak apo! Nak malu ko gapo! Wat tubik letak atas meja kaunter ni pun buleh! Cepatlah! kawe ado khijo lain lagi nih! Sibuk benar ni! Kena paham la!
    Kontraktor rumah : hoh! Ambo wak tubik dah ni ! Cepatla? tengok!

    Pegawai Bangunan : Laaa!(terkejut), buke pele ni!
    Kontraktor rumah : Tu la!, ambo ghoyak doh tadi kan? Pele ambo kecik! demo nok tengok jugak!
    Pegawai Bangunan : Laaaaaa! Buke pasal kecik besarnyo!, maksud kawe Pele Bangune (Pelan Bangunan).

    Kontraktor rumah : La! Ambo ingat pele nie! Kalu pele bangune, ado la dale beg nie! Tak ghoyak pun pele bangune!. Mano ambo tahu!
    Pegawai Bangunan : Kawe ingat demo paham! Hok dok mari doh pun tak penah jadi lagu nie! Demo dok mano?

    Kontraktor rumah : Gua Muse!


    Ujian Darah

    Sebaik sahaja mengambil tempat duduk di ruang menunggu sebuah klinik, Shan terpandang Amin sedang menangis teresak-esak. Dia segera mendekati Amin.

    Shan : Kenapa menangis?
    Amin : Saya datang untuk ujian darah.
    Shan : Awak takut ke?
    Amin : Bukan itu sebabnya. Semasa ujian darah dijalankan, mereka telah terpotong jari saya.
    Mendengarkan penjelasan Amin, Shan pula menangis.
    Amin : Eh, kenapa pula awak menangis?
    Shan : Saya datang untuk ujian air kencing...







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  3. #2
    s_bleeza is offline Hyper Active Member
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    Pelan bangunan nyer cete tu aku tak paham sgtlah.. Bahasa negeri mana tu? Maklumlah aku ni org Sabah, tak reti lagi bahasa2 kat semenanjung...



  4. #3
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    Quote Originally Posted by s_bleeza View Post
    Pelan bangunan nyer cete tu aku tak paham sgtlah.. Bahasa negeri mana tu? Maklumlah aku ni org Sabah, tak reti lagi bahasa2 kat semenanjung...

    tu bahasa klantan bleeza.. org ppuan mmg ssh skit nk pham cite yg tu,org laki je paham hehehe



  5. #4
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    Quote Originally Posted by antagenaiz View Post
    tu bahasa klantan bleeza.. org ppuan mmg ssh skit nk pham cite yg tu,org laki je paham hehehe
    opppppss!!!!!hanya org yang tertentu saja fahammm



  6. #5
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    aku suka betul cte pasal pele bangunan tu...tu memang lawak



  7. #6
    s_bleeza is offline Hyper Active Member
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    Quote Originally Posted by antagenaiz View Post
    tu bahasa klantan bleeza.. org ppuan mmg ssh skit nk pham cite yg tu,org laki je paham hehehe
    Kalo cenggitu aku nak p tanya member aku yg orang kelantan tu... Nak suh kasi translate ckit.. biar aku paham cete disebaliknya.. cam misteri jer...



  8. #7
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    pasal plan bangunan tue...haram aku xpaham...



  9. #8
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    Quote Originally Posted by suntat View Post
    pasal plan bangunan tue...haram aku xpaham...

    camne ko bleh xpham suntat..ni aku kompius ni



  10. #9
    antagenaiz's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by s_bleeza View Post
    Kalo cenggitu aku nak p tanya member aku yg orang kelantan tu... Nak suh kasi translate ckit.. biar aku paham cete disebaliknya.. cam misteri jer...
    ko kn mnuntut dlu ngn org2 klantan dlu bleeza br bleh pham citu tu ahaks



  11. #10
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    adeh... bahasa apa yang pakai tue


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